We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Randomize
