I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Slut skills are useful in every country.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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