moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
