there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I understand Curling. That high.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
