I accidentally had phone sex last night
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
