2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
And then my night got REAL pukey
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
