id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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