I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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