I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
