So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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