i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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