marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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