I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
