We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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