Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
