like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
