Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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