we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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