dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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