still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
this is an emotional support booty call
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
