How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
we made out on top of his cat.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize
