I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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