is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
