week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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