Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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