they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize