nut hugger
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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