Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
MIDGETS
????
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
