i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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