dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
This is the high leading the old right now
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize