I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Randomize
