He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
