I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
i believe in u and ur pee
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize