hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
