I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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