Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
