Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
