i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
