R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
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Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
