Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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