you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
