Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
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