I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
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