i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
