so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize