im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
