you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Also, beer. Big fan.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Randomize
