I'm drive I can fine osifer
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
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