They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Randomize
