the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
